Pitfall

It has been some time since last, and all in on hold. I am still looking for a new field with runway for the test flight. My determination is dwindling, so it seems, I am depressed with the though that destiny is taking away the ownership of my quest and dream. I am struggling with myself to muster the energy to get the job done. I think, the fear is that it may not work and not knowing the reason why, is cause for procrastinating the quest to succeed, maybe… I’m just not ready….
The other day a letter with pictures arrived in my E-mailbox. The sender sent me a concept he has worked out, an improvement in stabling the flight of a rubber powered aircraft. This concept seems to concur with literature I read on insect wing characteristics and behavior. Basically, insect wings have a rough surface that causes the air to tabulate on top there by creating lift. My assumption with this concept on the rubber powered aircraft is similar. I had considered something similar by rippling the wing surface of the Ductling when I first conceived the VeeBee configuration. It was inspired by the fossils sea shells my mother in-law had given me.
The question now is… when will I begin? This rut I’m in is not fading. Like a roller coaster ride and I’m heading downhill. I know this will not last forever, but I sure could use some relief or some positive support and inspiration. I guess I should look back to the rubber powered aircraft, it was uplifting, and I should work with that.
What is really bringing me down is the lack of money. We are planning for a vacation, a short one because that is all we can afford, but, out comes the shadow of surprise attacks. I get into accidence and total my front end of my vehicle. No one was hurt, thank God for that, but now I have inherited an unplanned expense that conflicts with procuring the vacation we had so desperately needed. It is my wife’s determination to continue our goal to take this vacation even if it put us in the poor house, not that we are already there, living beyond our means.
I probably have the same posture as the majority of the populous, the dept we are all trying desperately to get out of. Now I am beginning to understand my pitfall.

I need that break…